Tuesday, December 23, 2003
FIRST OF ALL......I HAVE WRITTEN TO THE COURT TO BLOCK YOUR MOTHER'S EFFORT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME. IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME WHEN YOU ARE NO LONGER A MINOR, THEN ........YOU SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO DO IT.
CHANGING YOUR NAME NOW IS SOMETHING I STRENUOUSLY OBJECT TO, AND HAVE ASKED TO COURT TO DENY UNTIL YOU ARE LEGALLY OLD ENOUGH TO DO IT YOURSELF.
It’s almost Christmas, and your mother is still keeping us from having any contact. I know that she must have filled your head with many stories, but I know that you still have the memories of the things we did together. I know that you remember the things we used to do together..........selling girl scout cookies, driving all over Illinois and Wisconsin looking for Beanie Babies,..............and all of the other things too. I know that we would leave the house when she would go on a rage, and we would have fun together. I just remembered the time in Antigua that she started screaming at us on the dock as we walked back to the ship. The guy with the baggy pants was in front of us and she just started screaming at me because you wanted to walk down a street to look at dolls, and I said we could. She said you had enough dolls and she wanted to go down a different street and look at purses or something. I told her that she should go down the street she wanted, and I would accompany you to look at dolls, and we would meet her on "her" street.
She stormed off, and you and I went to look at dolls. You didn't see any that you liked, so we met her on "her" street. On the way back to the ship, she began to complain loudly about how I always let you do whatever you wanted. I told her that you were only going to be a child once, only going to be in Antigua once, and I thought that we should do everything we could to make your childhood fun and as "magical" as we could. I told her that if you had found a doll you you liked, I would have bought it for you, just as I would have bought her another purse if she had found one she liked.
She exploded and started screaming that she was going to spend the rest of the cruise in the cabin, and that you and I could go to the Captain's party together.................without her!
That memory just came back to me. Maybe you will remember it too. Maybe you will remember it, and it will remind you of who REALLY loved you, and who REALLY raised you, and who made your childhood possible.
I don't know what you've been told. I know that you've been told many lies and many twisted stories. I don't have the ability to defend myself because we can't communicate freely. You need to have a roof over your head, and you need food, and I know that she is mean enough to threaten you with being thrown out of the house if you don't do what she wants, and say what she wants you to say.
She CANNOT stop me from LOVING YOU!!!